I Love You Cat

Dearest Ambrosia Andromeda Tigerpaw,

          You've always been close to me, as close as a feline can be.
          Even though you lick all of your hair off (you're soon sure to be a sphinx); you sound like a man-cat; you lock yourself in my room, pee on my carpet and chew on my things; you seldom use the litter box when nobody's watching; and you attack the other cats, you're still my very favourite cat. I like you even more than Finnigan and Casper.
          It was years ago in Montreal where we found you: a poor, bright-eyed young kitten wandering the streets of Brossard. I took you (helpless and mewling) into the basement and played with you and put you back out at bedtime at which point you destroyed the metal mesh screen to get back inside. Ever since, you've been worriedly close to me. It's almost obsessive, really. I am just a human. I am not made of catnip.
          I'm going away to college in the Fall and I'd like to let you know how honestly disturbed I am at the thought of parting with you. I think you'd have a better life at home. I've seen how well you get along with Casper and I see you've asserted your position as Boss Kitty in the household, even against the rapscallion Finnigan. I hope only that I can slip away whilst your back is turned and you won't ever notice (fairly possible).
         Let it be known that whenever I'll come home from college, it'll always be your smiling face I'll look most forward to. You're probably the best cat I'll ever have.

Lots of love,